Sunday, December 04, 2005

A day of nothing

In honor of my birthday, the big FOUR-OH, I have chosen to do NOTHING. I slept until past nine (late for a mom and dog-owner as well as ashtangi), and I ate half a corn muffin for breakfast with a big-ass cuppa hazelnut coffee. I sat around and did pretty much nothing for the next few hours as the Husband took the kids to Hebrew School and went to the gym. When they arrived home, I was pretty much where they had left me. They took Lewis out for his second walk of the day, and it occurred to me: this is the VERY FIRST DAY SINCE MID-OCTOBER that I have NOT LEFT MY HOUSE. And I LIKE days like that once in a while...today has been QUITE the luxury. No, luxury is NOT the right word. Today was a NECESSITY. I NEED days like this. A day of nothing has been sorely missing in my highly scheduled, hyperactive calendar.

While they were gone, I drew myself a nice hot bath, and contemplated taking a vinyasa class at Yoga Sutra....but with the heat and the twisting and the bending I inevitably started doing as I bathed left me with one path before me: Ashtanga.

That is how I came to lay down my mat, invoke Patanjali and practice on my own. And it was good. VERY good. I've been practicing on my own these past few days. Getting to the shala has been a major headache, and a huge time suck. Perhaps I will take some time away from practicing at the Shala until I can get there without the angst, or perhaps I will practice there three times a week instead of trying to get there six times a week, which has NOT been happening these days.

I now have the ability to do so, since I can bind Mari C on my own, without much preparation, without much drama, without slipping out of it. (Up until very recently, I have really needed to be where someone can yank me into it and hold me there.) Since it seems that I am not getting any new poses any time soon, perhaps it is best that I simply work alone more often for a while, be solitary in my practice. The obvious benefit is I will have more time to actually practice, having eliminated the travel time. No more rushing! But perhaps there are other benefits too...less distraction, less thinking, less hoping for approval, less waiting for some sign that maybe I will get a new pose....

We shall see. Is practicing alone okay, if I get myself to the shala at least a couple times a week? Again, I am seriously asking this question, and I know there are a lot of good answers out there....

YC

4 comments:

Karen said...

I don't have an answer, but a question: why would it *not* be a good idea to practice at home?

Happy B'Day!

Tiff said...

Happy Birthday Lauren!!!

Anonymous said...

"why would it *not* be a good idea to practice at home?"

Because pratcicing at the shala is an invaluable experience. I am continually amazed at what I learn from others. The feelign of community, etc. Also, for Lauren in particular, with her issues towards her teacher and the practice, a big part of the lessons she needs to learn are to be found at the shala.

Anonymous said...

Happy Belated Birthday Lauren!

Beth

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About Me

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Northern Westchester, New York, United States
I live by a duck pond. I used to live by the East River. I don't work. I used to work a lot. Now, not so much. I used to teach a lot of yoga. Now not so much. I still practice a lot of yoga though. A LOT. I love my kids, being outdoors, taking photos, reading magazines, writing and stirring the pot. Enjoy responsibly.

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