Sunday, January 07, 2007

Honeymoon in Vegas

Two thoughts come to mind regarding the marriage of Colleen Saidman and Rodney Yee:

1. Yee tries to justify the seemingly non-yogic, failure-of-ahimsa, ultimate betrayal of a spouse with: "[W]hen love hits you, it just devestates everything. Everything was blown down." Well, isn't that exactly what someone who cheats on a spouse would say? More importantly, in my opinion (and since this is my blog, it's always my opinion), a good rule of thumb in matters of the heart is that when it involves devestation and blowing everything down, it's best to step away.

But what's good sense and logic when you're of the mindset that you're not the master and mapmaker of your own actions? "There was something between us that was unavoidable," Yee elaborates. Unavoidable? I can think of ways that that "something" might have been avoided.

I'm trying not to judge, but I can't help but make the observation that in spite of our urges and desires, as human beings, our essential nature is to be able to control our urges and desires in order to honor commitments. Or else why make them? A commitment is easy right up to the point that you are tempted to break it. Then the work begins.

As I see it, you don't become a "warrior" until you've hit your edge.

2. Why is it always, inevitably, the story of the Model and the Rock Star?



karen said...


Hamptonite said...

Yes. This was a great read.

Anonymous said...

OK, I must disagree. If you fall deeply in love, as Colleen and Rodney seem to be, life is short and I don't oppose that kind of love. I also favor staying with your family, spouse, and children, but it is a choice for each person, and not always bad.

samasthiti said...

We all have to work out our own Karma, so whatever Rodney reaps Rodney will eventually sew.

The thing that gets me is how much it's romanticized and how publicly acceptable this is.
The two beautiful yogis in love. They dumped their spouses that they actually didn't not like, so they could do each other, I mean "fall in love".

Anonymous said...

wow, sam...harsh words. i am pretty sure that they did like their spouses, but they liked each other more, what is so wrong about that?
love can come more than once in a lifetime. you can go for it, or for ever guessing what could have been!

samasthiti said...

Look, I am seeing this as a complete outsider, so whatever I say doesn't really matter. To me it's gross because it's being made all beautiful and glossy in the media. If you look back in the media a bit it sounds like "love" had been coming to him on more than this occasion....He had some
allegations against him in California. Obviously we don't know the whole sordid story. So maybe his marriage was on the rocks, fine whatever. But I'm not going to get all warm and fuzzy over this.

More harsh words...Sorry!:)

"YC" said...

Well, obviously, you already know where I stand on it because I wrote the post in the first place. But I have to strenuously agree with "Sam" (I like that nickname Susan!).

It is a choice that you make to venture down that road and be open to love with someone other than your spouse. You don't have to be open to it. And even if you feel an intense desire for someone, you don't have to act on it. You don't have to give the longing looks and the desperate phone calls. You don't have to be seductive or be seduced. Yeah, we have only one life to live, but the world would be awfully chaotic if everyone were a slave to their desires, rather than making adult decisions to keep certain doors closed which, if allowed to open, would create "devestation", as Yee puts it, even as it allows "love" (lust?) to bloom.

"YC" said...

And one more thing to note: Rodney and Collen ALLOWED the NY Times to write up their wedding. Maybe not just allowed - probably had their PR agents MAKE it happen. THAT is truly icky.

YogaDawg said...

“She put her thumb on my forehead, right on the third eye, and literally I felt something I’d never felt before,” Mr. Yee remembered. “It was almost like: ‘Who are you? What just happened?’ That was the turning point. There was something between us that was unavoidable.”

There is definitely a lot of material for parody in the story.

Anonymous said...

oh, well, (sigh...)I just try not to be too judgemental, but everybody has
the right to their own opinion,
i hope they (c & r) can be happy together,
(i do know c, but not r!)

"YC" said...

And parody, there must be, Yogadawg.

Anonymous said...

yoga chickie. you spend too much time doing yoga to be passing judgement on these people that you do not know.

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I live by a duck pond. I used to live by the East River. I don't work. I used to work a lot. Now, not so much. I used to teach a lot of yoga. Now not so much. I still practice a lot of yoga though. A LOT. I love my kids, being outdoors, taking photos, reading magazines, writing and stirring the pot. Enjoy responsibly.


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