Change is hard
As excited as I am to move to my new house and start a whole new and hopefully wonderful chapter of my life, I felt a twinge of sadness when I opened a letter this morning that came from our soon-to-be-former synagogue. It began: "We are pleased to notify you that Brian's bar mitzvah celebration has been scheduled for April 10, 2010."
Suddenly, I am filled with feelings of regret. All of the ways that I might have participated in the synagogue come rushing to mind. Ever since my favorite cantor left the congregation, I have been in a mild protest mode, not participating in much of anything. Now, I see the road not chosen sprawling out before me, and well, I feel at loose ends, a bit lost, a bit confused.
I know I want to move to a big house with a big yard with all of the possibilities for playing outside with my kids and cooking family dinners and having a place to store everything so that I can actually see the clothes that I might want to wear and the pots and pans that I might want to use and the photo albums that I might want to peruse. But this letter threw me for a loop.
Maybe I'm in a sad mood to begin with because I'm stuck home on this beautiful spring day. Adam is home sick. I missed practice. Citta vrittis abound. I am thinking, if I practice, I will feel somewhat better. Must do that.
YC
1 comment:
I guess I'm a little behind in saying this, but I'm really glad you decided to make your blog public again. I really enjoy reading it :) Thanks for taking another shot at it!
I think it is normal that you would be feeling a little unsure right now, there are some big changes going on in your life, but there will always be one constant to carry you through; your practice. Good luck with everything! :)
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